May 11 2008
Pastoral Recovery
Good Morning, it’s Sunday morning about 5:30 am here in Denver. I woke up in peace and I thought it was so noteworthy, I’d tell you about it. You see, back in the day, with our first church plant we started in Portland, waking up on Sunday morning was like getting up to fight the French Foreign Legion. I had such a fear of speaking, preaching, leading, and holding our community together, that I would get nauseous as soon as I’d realized it was Sunday morning. I’d usually have stayed up till 1:ooam plowing over and over on my sermon, and then back up at 4:00am out of nerves to go back over my words. I’d drive to church depressed and often it would take me 60 minutes of prayer just to fight back the fear of approaching the community.
Today, I got up and was excited. The fact that I was even able to take my mind off today’s events shows that God is re-orienting me towards a better way. Adullam has taught me that people don’t come to a church gathering for a sermon. Or if they do, they’re coming for the wrong reason. Adullamites come to connect with God and see friends. That changes everything. I’m not really preaching today. I’m just going to walk the community through the sermon on the mount and see how people are feeling. I’ve been meditating on it all week and do have a few thoughts to share, but I don’t feel any need to button it together into a monologue. Jesus just seems to be in the room and I’m learning to trust his spontaneous voice to myself and the community. I wonder what would happen if every pastor felt like they could just read scripture and facilitate a more simple and relational approach to spiritual learning. I’m not suggesting at all that a well thought out sermon isn’t helpful, but quite possibly adults may learn better from an approach that requires them to participate. It may also release many leaders from the performance miseries every week.
This morning, I’ll take my daughter Alli with me. She loves to go early and hang out with me. I wouldn’t have had the peace of heart to do this ten years ago, but this morning I’m looking forward to donuts and Alli, and friends.
[...] Pastoral Recovery (Hugh Halter) – I’ve only had a chance to speak with Hugh once or twice on the phone, but really appreciate what he is helping to develop with Missio. I’m looking forward to getting my hands on a copy of the new book he co-authored: The Tangible Kingdom. [...]
oh Hugh… we LOVED you in Portland, and couldn’t wait for Sundays! I wish we’d have been better able to lead along with you, but it’s cool to see the journey we’ve all been on since those days. I can’t wait to read your book!
Hugh Baby,
Because you have become the “Legend of Clackamas High” and the Class of 1983 had so many stud muffins packed into it, how about a trek up the Mt Hood to the summit this April?? Love to have you. What say you?
By the way I never knew you use to grind or pump out sermons in Portland! That kind of crap puts a man into the grave early, thats about all it does!
Jim Small
Portland/Clackamas/Mt Hood